DOUBLE STANDARDS IN RELATIONSHIPS - BREAKING STEREOTYPES

Dear Humans,

"Why not go halves?

You ate the food didn't you?"

It’s me again cooking up a list of relatable subjects to get your brains thinking. So it’s 2017 and women are frowned upon for sleeping around and men are expected to cash out on dates. Dear women you should be pretty, kind, smile when a guy tells you to, sleep with 0 people, yet still have children, raise them well, cook for them, stay in shape, like pink, eat pink and dream rainbows. Dear men, you should be cool, calm and collected, bad for the streets but sweet to your girl so I hear, bring in the bacon, pay the bills, cash out on dates, you can cheat if you want it’s kind of expected so I guess we’re 'supposed' to take you back.

My sarcasm is clearly never-ending...

I spoke to some single and taken guys and dolls to ask about double standards in relationships and this is what they had to say.

Guys

Would you let your girl go out and party as much as you or more?

"I can't control my woman and I don't feel any man should."

Ash: Personally, I have no problem with my Mrs going out, simply because I know she can handle her own as much as me. Difficult one because I am out a lot but there’s levels to it, I don’t control my woman and I don’t feel any man should. Common grounds of understanding is key but no woman should want to be out every weekend likewise for men.

Stefan: Being who I am, I wouldn't be happy with it. I don't personally go out at that much, but if we were speaking from the perspective of someone who does go out a lot the answer can vary because everyone has different reasons as to why they don't let there girlfriend go out. My reasons are because it's not safe, a lot of men don't understand 'no' and a lot of men are persistent. I don't want my girlfriend to be in that position all the time, every weekend. It wouldn't be a case of letting her go, I would just say to her I wouldn't want to be with someone who goes out all the time. Me being a guy, I already know what guys are like so I just know I wouldn't need my girlfriend to be in that position. If you continue to do that then you must be a party girl and thats not the kind of girl I wanna be with. It should be established from the get go, you should know whether they are a party person or not.

Ki: I don't mind a free spirit, if partying is your enjoyment then enjoy it.

Why do you think it's frowned upon for women to be as promiscuous as men?

Stefan: It's frowned upon because a woman's body should be her shrine so she shouldn't put herself out there the way a man would. You have to remember if we are going down to instincts a mans instinct is to want to go for women and be out there, have as much women as he possibly can, that's how us men feel alive and feel like men. It's part of our manhood so just because it's something that we do, it's not to take the piss. Being promiscuous isn't something all women do or that all women want to do. I'm not saying ALL men want to be promiscuous but I mean at some point in a mans life he's gonna have that stage where he is like 'Yeah, I'm tryna be out here.'

The main reason it is frowned upon is because most of the frowning comes from men. A lot of women have the same idea where they believe they should keep their body sacred. Women doing the opposite and going against the grain will always be frowned upon. It's more of a social conflict that is down to the individual. It's down to roles that men and women play, promiscuity doesn't fall into a woman's category.

Ki: Because of that 'master key' tale I believe. So society has played its part in imprinting that in our minds.

Have you ever judged a woman for being as promiscuous as a man, whether you told her or not?

Stefan: Yes and no, I'll only mentally judge the ones who aren't open about it. If it's your thing and you are open and honest about it then cool, not saying you have to tell everyone your business but just own it, don't act like you are not promiscuous. Some men like that, I only judge when they try and come across as the complete opposite.

Who do you think should pay for dates?

Stefan: I think it should be 50/50 or like 60/40. When I go out and I'm with my girl I pay for the majority of the things and she'll pay for some. For example if I pay for the meal, she might get dessert or the drinks. Sometimes she'll get the meal and I'll pay for everything else for the rest of the day. I think both people should actively make an effort to chip in in someway, it's about being fair. When it comes down to paying for things if it's me saying 'I am taking you out on a date' then yeah I am going to pay because I am taking you out of your house to come out with me and be in my company. It's give and take, we are at an age where it should be that.

Ash: I don’t think it should be set, if you’re in a relationship long term or even one that’s just started out it shouldn’t be who's paying. Either spilt it or one gets the bills this time and vice versa. Only on first dates etc. I think the man should pay.

What roles do you think men and women should play in the household?

Ki: I was always lead to believe that a male is the provider of the family and I still believe it will be like that or play like that for the next 50 years. I personally